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December 01, 2015

NFL power rankings: NFC Hierarchy/Obituary after Week 12

Eagles NFL
120115DeSeanJackson Alex Brandon/AP

Remember when DeSean Jackson did stuff for the Eagles? #Memories.

Week 12 of the NFL season is in the books. We have no new obituaries -- not even the Eagles -- although they are more like walking zombies than actual living beings. Here's this week's Hierarchy/Obituary.

GRAVEYARD

Graveyard after 11


MORE: And now people are saying Titans could send first round pick for Chip Kelly  |  Barring a miraculous turnaround, Eagles should part ways with Chip Kelly  |  Kelly must put ego aside, admit mistakes and change accordingly -- or else


HIERARCHY

Eagles

9) Eagles (4-7)

I mean... Let's be real -- The Eagles are done, except the rest of the NFC East won't cooperate. Had the Giants beaten the Redskins last week, I would have killed off both the Eagles and Redskins. Instead, the Eagles remain walking zombies and the Redskins are now in the driver's seat in the division.

Still, as for the Eagles, we're already looking ahead to the next calendar year:

Eagles calendar year

Giants

8) Giants (5-6)

After their loss in Washington last Sunday, Dwayne Harris of the Giants said that the Giants may have overlooked the Redskins, via Jordan Raanan of NJ.com. Wait, what? The Giants win a moral victory against the Pats a week ago, and now they think they're going to walk over a team with one fewer loss on the road? Lol.

Falcons

7) Falcons (6-5)

The Atlanta Falcons against the NFC East: 4-0.

The Atlanta Falcons against everyone else: 2-5.

Conclusion: The Falcons are a bad team whenever they play teams outside of the God-awful NFC East.

Redskins

6) Redskins (5-6)

Hey look, the Redskins actually have a five-game win streak at home and are in the driver's seat in the NFC East. In early October, my daughter predicted that Washington would win the division, by the way, and she is never wrong:


To note, my daughter has made three other predictions in her young career as an NFL prognosticator:

  1. She predicted the Eagles would win the NFC East in 2013.
  2. She predicted the Seahawks win the Super Bowl in 2013.
  3. She predicted the Patriots would win the Super Bowl in 2014.

She's 3-0, and the Redskins have by far the easiest remaining schedule in the NFC East:

Redskins Giants Eagles Cowboys 
 Cowboys (3-8)Jets (6-5) At Patriots (10-1)  At Redskins (5-6)
 At Bears (5-6)At Dolphins (4-7)  Bills (5-6) At Packers (7-4)
 Bills (5-6)Panthers (11-0) Cardinals (9-2)  Jets (6-5)
 At Eagles (4-7)At Vikings (8-3)  Redskins (5-6) At Bills (5-6)
 At Cowboys (3-8)Eagles (4-7)  At Giants (5-6) Redskins (5-6)
 20-35 (0.364)33-22 (0.600)34-21 (0.618) 28-27 (0.509)


Also, in case you're looking for stocking stuffers that'll help finance whatever it is DeSean Jackson spends his money on, here you go:

010815Seahawks

5) Seahawks (6-5)

Unfortunately for the Redskins, there's a good chance that if they win the division, they'll have to play the Seahawks at home in the Wildcard round of the playoffs. Again. That won't go well for them. Redskins fans should also be Falcons fans the rest of the way.

Vikings

4) Vikings (8-3)

Adrian Peterson is on pace for just under 1700 yards this season, and has basically carried the Vikings to their 8-3 record. Remember when he was going to be on the Cowboys this offseason?

010915Packers

3) Packers (7-4)

The Packers are 7-4, and a game behind the Vikings, obviously, but their next three opponents are the Lions, Cowboys and Raiders. The NFC North may come down to the Packers-Vikings finale Week 17 at Lambeau. That game could essentially determine who plays at home in a rematch the following week in the first round of the playoffs, like the Eagles and Cowboys had back in 2009.

Cardianls

2) Cardinals (9-2)

Once the Cardinals dispatch of the awful Rams this week, three of their final four games to close to the season are against the Vikings, Packers and Seahawks.

Normally, you might say that facing a tough schedule down the stretch is a bad thing as teams jockey for playoff position. However, in the Cardinals' case, as long as they can win enough games to maintain their 2 seed status, the tough slate could be a nice playoff primer for them.

Panthers helmet

1) Panthers (11-0)

All five of the Panthers' opponents are Mediocre City:

 OpponentWins Losses 
 At Saints
 Falcons
 At Giants
 At Falcons
 Buccaneers
 TOTAL26 29 


This team can't really go undefeated, can it?


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