Yes, the heated Wawa vs. Sheetz debate never seems to end, but there’s one thing you’ve never seen dragged into the fight for supremacy.
That would be giving a competitor an edge on account of people microwaving urine at one rather than the other.
- RELATED STORIES
- Liquid gold: Pain doctors soak up profits by screening urine for drugs
- Proposed bill would seek mandatory drug tests for state candidates
- Forget Wawa and Sheetz: This is Pennsylvania's BEST gas station convenience store
For that – as evidenced by a story out of Colorado late last week – you’d have to include 7-Eleven in the battle.
If what Aurora, Colorado police say is true, a 26-year-old woman named Angelique Sanchez found herself in a sticky situation after “a container of what appeared to be urine blew up as she was heating it up in a microwave at a 7-Eleven.”
Akin to a situation that happened last year in Beaverton, Oregon, Sanchez apparently bought into the theory that heating urine will help one pass a looming drug test.
It’s not as crazy as it may initially seem. A website titled Pass A Drug Testing for All notes that "urine test ninjas" recommend heating it in a microwave for no more than 8-12 seconds, for what it’s worth, which isn't much since it'll probably still turn up – wait for it – hot. (This seemingly comes into play when someone has a friend pee into a cup for them and has to heat it up to 98.6 degrees as it would be when it exited a body. #themoreyouknow.)
Alas, Sanchez allegedly went a bit too far, what with an employee hearing “a loud bang” before seeing the suspect “take a white plastic bottle out of the microwave.” Sanchez then allegedly “wiped a yellow liquid that smelled like urine onto the floor and walked out.”
Savage.
The law found her shortly thereafter at a nearby clinic – where she reportedly planned to take a urine test in pursuit of a new job – and hit her with a summons for damaging the property. (The microwave was valued at $500; human dignity is priceless.)
We called out to the location on Monday morning for an update, but the manager said that “we’ve already informed the police so I can’t speak more about it.” He said he’d have the owner give a call if he or she was able, but as of press time, that hadn’t occurred.
Moral of the story: Either don’t do drugs (at all, or when you have a looming test) or find a better way to pass it that doesn’t involve defiling a convenience store.