After what has seemed like an endless cycle of Oscars-related news, the award show is finally on the horizon. So cheers to our last week of Oscars think-pieces!
Going off that logic, I present you with an Oscars drinking game only suitable for this year's host-less, "Eighth Grade"-less, plan-less ceremony.
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If you're among those planning to watch the 91st-annual Academy Awards on Sunday, Feb. 24 at 8 p.m. – here's where it can be streamed – chances are you've been following along with the near-daily chaos and are devoted to this drama.
But viewership for the show has been steadily falling since the '80s. In fact, a show that costs the most for advertisers (in 2016 a 30-second spot averaged $1.72 million) hit a nine-year low in 2018 with 26.5 million viewers.
So if you are one of the committed, you'll know that Dwayne Johnson was first asked (and unavailable) to host the ceremony. Then Kevin Hart was picked, until his homophobic tweets surfaced, and he stepped down as host ... then he didn't, then he rejected the job.
Songs from "A Star is Born" and "Black Panther" were going to be the only two musical numbers, then the other movies got upset, now all the nominees for Best Original Song will perform.
A few categories were going to be presented during commercials, then they would still air but slightly edited, now they're all getting equal time on stage during the live taping.
So if you're still here: No one is hosting, a lot of people are performing, and it's going to be long.
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There's one way to simultaneously make fun of the Oscars and revel in them – alcohol. Here are the rules to the 2019 Academy Awards drinking game:
• Drink every time someone mentions Kevin Hart.
• Drink every time you see a #TimesUp button.
• Drink every time an award is partially edited or re-aired after it had been awarded during a commercial break.
• Finish your drink if Gaga makes the "There could be 100 people in the room but 99 don't believe in you ..." speech.
• Drink every time someone mentions Trump, The Wall, or the national emergency.
• Drink if Glenn Close, Sam Elliott, or Regina King win their first-ever Oscars after many years of oversights.
• Drink every time an acceptance speech gets cut off with instrumental music because it's too long.
• Drink if Kendrick Lamar appears to perform "All the Stars" with SZA. Right now, he's unconfirmed to show.
• Drink if Lin-Manuel Miranda shows up.• Finish your drink if you actually survive the three-plus-hour-show.
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