Week 9 of the NFL season is in the books, and the Detroit Lions have separated themselves from the rest of the NFC as the clear alpha dog in the conference. We have no new obituaries this week.
Graveyard
Hierarchy
14) Giants (2-7): We're overdue killing off the Giants, but their loss to the Commanders Week 9 wasn't "lol Giant'y" enough to eulogize them this week. Maybe if they lose at home to the Panthers Week 11. Or maybe if even if they win and mess up their draft positioning? Anyway, not happening this week.
I will note this quickly:
Saquon Barkley:
• 8 games with the Eagles (2024): 157 carries, 925 yards, 5.9 YPC, 6 TD
• 14 games with the Giants (2023): 247 carries, 962 yards, 3.9 YPC, 6 TD
Last week: 14
13) Cowboys (3-5): The Cowboys have the fourth-worst record (3-5), the third-worst point differential (-54), and and the third-longest losing streak (3 games) in the NFC, and now they'll be without their quarterback -- the highest-paid player in the league, no less -- reportedly for "multiple weeks."
The last time a team repeated as NFC East division winners was when the Eagles did it in 2004. In each of the last 18 seasons, we've seen the previous year's division champion dethroned.
| Year | NFC East champion |
| 2004 | |
| 2005 | |
| 2006 | |
| 2007 | |
| 2008 | |
| 2009 | |
| 2010 | |
| 2011 | |
| 2012 | |
| 2013 | |
| 2014 | |
| 2015 | |
| 2016 | |
| 2017 | |
| 2018 | |
| 2019 | |
| 2020 | |
| 2021 | |
| 2022 | |
| 2023 | Cowboys |
| 2024 | Probably not the Cowboys |
The Cowboys are now 3.5 games behind the Commanders in the NFC East, and 3 games behind the Eagles. What do you think of your team this season, Dak?
Last week: 13
12) Seahawks (4-5): The Seahawks and Rams played a crazy, back-and-forth game on Sunday that was won by the Rams in OT.
I feel like the Seahawks play more of those kinds of games than any other team in the NFL, which makes sense because they are talented, but also extremely erratic.
On the opening possession of OT, Seattle had a 3rd and 1 from the Rams' 16 yard line. They ran it twice with Kenneth Walker, who got stuffed twice for no gain. The Rams then scored on their ensuing possession, and won.
It has to suck to have a 3rd and 1, and not have the tush push at your disposal. (And yes, I realize that this perhaps isn't the week to say "sucks to not have the tush push," seeing as it failed twice for the Eagles on Sunday, but shut up.)
Last week: 10
11) Bears (4-4): The Bears started 4-2, but they now have consecutive losses to the Commanders and Cardinals, and they are looking a little more like what we thought they were, right Dennis Green?
Last week: 9
10) Cardinals (5-4): I decided in my Week 9 picks article that Arizona is my official "Fraudometer™️" team of the 2024 season. What's the Fraudometer™️? Well, if you can beat the Fraudometer™️ team, you might not be frauds. If you can't, you are.
We learned in Week 8 that the Dolphins were still frauds even with the return of Tua Tagovailoa, and we learned in Week 9 that the Bears are frauds. The Cardinals' upcoming schedule is almost too perfect for testing which teams are frauds, and which ones aren't:
Week 10: Jets
Week 11: BYE
Week 12: At Seahawks
Week 13: At Vikings
9) Buccaneers (4-5): If you have a chance to beat the Chiefs in regulation with a two-point conversion, it's kind of a no-brainer to go for the two-point conversion instead of giving Patrick Mahomes a chance to beat you in overtime. Todd Bowles is an awesome defensive schemer, but holy hell does he make some bad in-game decisions.
Last week: 12
Last week: 7
6) Falcons (6-3): Teams that are going to cruise to divisional titles because their divisions suck power rankings:
- Bills
- Texans
- Falcons
5) Vikings (6-2): The Vikings got through the difficult portion of their schedule with a 5-2 record. They are now in the easy section:
Week 9: Colts: W
Week 10: At Jaguars: ?
Week 11: At Titans: ?
Week 12: At Bears: ?
Interesting stretch ahead -- Three bad teams, but three straight road games.
4) Packers (6-3): Prior to the season, Jordan Love was a hipster pick for MVP. He's 22nd in QB rating, 20th in QBR, and he leads the NFL with 10 INTs despite missing two games.
3) Eagles (6-2): During their four-game winning streak the Eagles have outgained their opponents 1555-858.
| Eagles opponent | Eagles yards | Opponent yards | Yardage differential |
| Browns | 372 | 244 | +128 |
| At Giants | 339 | 119 | +220 |
| At Bengals | 397 | 280 | +117 |
| Jaguars | 447 | 215 | +232 |
| TOTAL | 1555 | 858 | +697 |
Those teams have a combined record of 10-26 (0.278), but the Eagles also clearly outplayed all of them, even if the Browns game was close because of a blocked field goal returned for a touchdown and the Jaguars game was close because Jacksonville returned a non-fumble for a touchdown.
Last week: 5
2) Commanders (7-2): Jayden Daniels continues to impress, but the Commanders' defense is 26th in DVOA. The only teams behind them are the Raiders (2-7), the Dolphins (2-6), the Cowboys (3-5), the Patriots (2-7), the Jaguars (2-7), and the Panthers (2-7).
Last week: 3
1) Lions (7-1): Prior to their matchup against the Green Bay Packers at Lambeau Field, all eight of the Lions' games this season had been played indoors. In 2023, they had a three-game losing streak outdoors, including their loss to the 49ers in the NFC Championship Game. As such, there were questions whether they could still play well in the elements, a fair question, given that Jared Goff isn't known for having a strong arm relative to many of his peers.
Welp, they put that nonsense to bed in an emphatic win over the Packers on the road on Sunday.
I think that what makes this team scary is that they now know how good they are and they have swagger, as evidenced by Amon-Ra St. Brown showing up to Green Bay in a "GREENBAY SUCKS" hoodie.
It's almost extra disrespectful that "GREENBAY" is all one word.
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