No matter how centered you are as a person, there are always going to be people who, through their words or actions, threaten to throw you off a positive mental track. It is so important to know that in these scenarios, you have the power to maintain control over your own personal happiness and you must exercise that control to preserve it.
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If you are someone who constantly finds yourself in the position where another person’s words or actions bring you down, it may be time to reevaluate your mental toolkit and learn some essential skills that will pull you through these situations.
Below are six versatile tactics that you can employ in these scenarios to keep your emotional well-being strong and steadfast, even up against the most challenging of people:
Adopt the mantra: 'I don’t allow my emotions to be dictated by others'
If your happiness if regularly brought down by negative interactions with people around you, this is your new mantra, “I don’t allow my happiness to be dictated by others.” When you start looking at your happiness as something you have cultivated for yourself, you realize that you have the obligation to protect it. If you allow other people’s attitude or mood to shape your own, you are essentially throwing your happiness into the wind. Repeat this to yourself when you feel someone dragging you down.
Learn to listen without reacting
Listening intently to what someone is saying without reacting is one of the most undervalued forms of communication. Practice listening to people and simply nodding to let them know that you are hearing them when they are on a rant. Often times, people just want to be heard and need a place to vent.
Know when things aren’t your problem
That being said, it is important to be able to decipher when something is your problem and when something is not. Aggressive, defensive and insecure people try to blame their problems on others. Be mindful of what you take on. Sensitive people tend to make everyone’s problems their own and try to fix them, and thereby many times are easy targets for people to dump on. Although taking on other people’s problems may seem like the right thing to do, it really is better to stay in your own lane and only take on the problems that directly affect you or those you love.
Don’t give the situation more life
Repeating things to coworkers, family or friends can be tempting when someone has just gone on a tirade directed towards you but it is truly best to keep stories to yourself. Think about letting it die right where it happened. Don’t carry it with you or pass it on to others. In the grand scheme of things, it most likely means very little so don’t give it any more of your precious airtime.
Refresh your perspective
Remind yourself of what you are grateful for and what really matters. Think of yourself as a beacon of positivity that stands firm. Tell yourself that you are grateful for the things you have, starting with your health, the health of your family, and all of the other things that have real substance in life.
Come from a place of kindness
That old saying, “kill them with kindness,” really does work. Not to say that you should be a doormat, but always keep your cool and never let anyone see you lose your composure. If you are always kind, even in the face of adversity, you will never have any regrets. Better yet, you will prove that you are unshakeable.
Over time, these practices will become second nature to you. Remember, you will never be able to completely avoid dealing with these types of people, so your best bet is to find a way to handle them.
I hope you find these tactics as helpful as I have. I would love to hear any of your tips for dealing with difficult people.
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I hope you find these tactics as helpful as I have. I would love to hear any of your tips for dealing with difficult people. Please feel free to share your ideas here. Follow me for updates @christiemandia.