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May 26, 2017

Stephen A. Smith and his terrible, horrible, no good, very bad NBA Finals predictions

Perhaps my favorite part of the above headline is the fact that Stephen A. Smith would most likely never use any of those words. 

If he wrote that headline, it would probably read: "Stephen A. Smith and his egregious, abominable, godawful, appalling..." – you get the idea. He likes big words and he can not lie.

In fact, when I was in high school and Smith was still writing for The Philadelphia Inquirer, my friends and I would play a game while editing the school newspaper to see who could write the most ridiculous-sounding Smith-esque sentence. 

And soon, we found out the easiest way to do that was to write a totally normal sentence, pick out a few key verbs and adjectives, go to a thesaurus, and replace those words with the longest, most polysyllabic word you can find.

It sounds way too simple. But it works like a charm. 

Anyway, the 2017 NBA Finals are set, with Golden State and Cleveland set to face off once again. If you're a fan of either, just hope that Stephen A. doesn't pick your team to win. He's gotten every Finals wrong since 2011. 


That's hard to do. James Dator of SB Nation thankfully broke down the odds of just how difficult:

The odds of getting a 50/50 guess wrong six times in a row is 1/64, or 1.56 percent. If Stephen A. Smith blindfolded himself and had to point to a name, there would be a 98.44 percent chance he’d get at least one NBA Finals prediction correct over this time span.  [sbnation.com]

That's not good. Or as Stephen A. would say yell, "That's reprehensible."

[Hey, we never said he always picked the best word.]


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